BesDaY GiRL ReQueST

Haa...sangat lama x jenguk blog ni...idle agak lama since raya...hohoho...today aku nak start balik la ... kena consistent...susah betul aku ni nk consisten kan...hohoho

Hari ank sdare aku punye besday...she secifically ask me to come back home for her besday... So as feveret auntie x sanggu la nk hampakan ank sdare nan seorang ni...trs la aku beli tiket air asia n blk kg hr ni..xde la murah sgt...total rm142 oo...rm69 pegi blk + rm4 caj debit kad...siot j air asia ni....

And this is my ride...tgh tggu ms berlepas ni...see u again when i touch down..hehehe

Bila Rasa Itu Menggamit Hati

Ku meniti awan yang kelabu.. Ku tempuhi lorong yang berliku.. Mencari sinar yang menerangi kegelapanku... Ku percaya nanti suatu masa... Sang suria kan menyinar jua... Membawa harapan yang menggunung.. Bersamanya....

Hahaha.. berjiwang pulak malam2 nie ye.... But that is the truth.. Aku betul2 x sabar nak habiskn lag seulan setengah aku punye probation period... I need to move on... Start a new life... Tapi itu la yang paling susah nak buat... Xpe la... Just feeling the pain... Stop running... Face it.. Face it.. Face it!!!

And stop contacting him!!!! Dia x rasa pun kehilangan ko.. So he is not suffering.. U are if u keep contacting him.. Just stop already.. For ur own good... Just be lonely.. Just be sad.. Be heart broken.. Be selfless... Be vulnerable...

Layan feeling nga lagu kat bawah la... Tapi mcm x relate sgt nga post nie.. Lantak la kn... Hehehe

Kau memang igauan ngeri dalam hidup aku!!!!!!!!!!!!

CeRiTa PaSaL TeLur

Haa... hari nie aku x berbuka kat ofis... very strange la balik pukul 6 but jalan seems so clear.. Clear nie bukan la langsung xde kete but clear federal highway... sape penah experience dia tau la... hahaha... And by the way, balik keje semalam aku p makan Mc D... hahaha.. dh lama mengidam tue...

Ditakdirkan la hari ini terdetik la hati aku nak memasak... Scramble egg je pun.. hahaha.. for aku punye sahur la... dh 2 hari aku x bangun sahur =( ... Ingat nak buat sandwich telur la... Tapi bila pecahkan telur tu.. WTF.. sumer dah busuk... huhuhu... memang la dh lepas expired date yg dia tulis kt bekas tue but sebelum nie xde pulak rosak mcm tue... Thinking about it pun dh buat aku rasa nak muntah.. Bau dia... Euwww....

This is 1st time la aku experience menda nie... Before this, ade la jugak aku beli telur kt Giant, dh dkt sebulan jgk lbh dr tarikh yg dia tulis but telur tue still ok... But dis one, nightmare ooo... Telur nie aku beli kat Tesco... memang low qualiti punye ke ape aku xtau... Ade gak kawan aku cite yang telur Tesco yang dia beli macam cair sgt... Ntah2 nie telur import dari China x.. Telur tiruan ke... Hohoho.. Xde hal nk berkonspirasi lak kt sini... Hahaha..

Moral of the story... jangan la ngengada beli sepapan telur 30 biji kalo memang malas nak masak... Nanti telur expired busuk... Huhuhu... Beli yang 10 je la... mahal pun xpe janji x membazir... And xde telur busuk... hehehe

 

BerBuKa Di OfiS

Hmm... hari nie partner aku x datang ofis.. Sian dia kete dia accident.. Macam teruk je... Sebab tue la aku x balik2 lagi nie.. Biasanye dia yang kalut ajak aku balik.. Rini since no push masa nie pun aku x gerak balik lagi... So berbuka di ofis la aku hari nie... hahaha...

Sebenarnye sama je berbuka mane2 pn... aku sebat air nga kurma je nanti... Macam skrg ni bile balik ade gk possibility aku nk g mane2 kdai beli makanan... Macam nk makan Mc D pn ade nie... hehehe... Nanti la aku update berbuka nga ape hari nie...

Favourite Drama : What If ParT 2

Kali ni aku nak sambung review What If la... Last time sampai episod 3 je kan...sekarang dah sampai episod 7.. Lama jugak ek aku stop... Dulu ingat nye nak review la cite2 lain yg best skali tapi yang nie drama yang still on going n best bagi aku.. Sumer cite2 best yang aku follow dah habis...

Episod 4 tajuk dia What If U Became A Woman... hahaha... khas untuk lelaki la nie... Story ni pasal Dickinson, one of the nurse kat wad jiwa tue.. Looney Pine kot nama dia... don't really pay attention to dat..hehehe... Dickinson nie gay... selamba badak je dia liwat si Imzan tue..Euwww!!! So as an act of tak puas ati kn Imzan tue tulis la dalam buku dia What if dis Dickinson is a woman... So dat dia dapat rasa what it feels like to helpless bile kna buli n keji nga org... Yg Dickinson nie dia dh ade bini kot..And dia layan bini dia cam hampeh...Dia pn jaga mak dia yg dh nyanyuk..slalu halusinate yg akak dia yg dh mati still ade... Sian lak kt bini Dickinson nk melayan.. Bila Dickinson slowly dh jadi mcm pmpuan, mcm2 la dia buat to change dat.. He even try nk pecahkan peti suara dia nga pisau..pergh..ngeri!! Masa dia pegi kt bilik Imzan dia terbaca ape yg Imzan tulis... So dia agk mmg keje Imzan la tue... Up to one point dia punye feature completely like a woman n mak dia ingat tu akak dia yg dh mati... Hahaha... pas2 dia pn menyamar la jd nurse pmpuan baru n pegi kt bilik Imzan mintak Imzan tukar dia balik jadi pmpuan... Masa tue la baru Imzan start to realise yg dia ade power nie...

Sambungan episod 5 Imzan mula explore dia punye ability... Start dari situ dia dah x aik ubat2 yg doktor bagi..n dia start to remember his past.. Pasal ank dia Shasha yang dia x dpt jumpa...Bini dia yg dh mati...N bapak mertua dia yang halang percintaan diorg... Rupa2nye Rashidi Ishak aka Datuk Kamal kot kalo x silap dlm cite nie is one of the main donator for Looney Pine nie..dats wh Imzan stuck kt situ..Push to be mad by all the doctors yg rawat dia.. So bile dia off the meds dia memang really sane la.. Doctor Priya yang rawat dia  pn kata CT scan dia mmg really good. So masa tue la dia start investigate what happen to Dickinson...Makcik Habsah yg jadi serial killer tue.. Dr Raihana yg masuk wad jiwa sbb dgr fikiran org n Guna attendance yg mati kt wad sana.. Yg nampak hantu tue.. Bila dah certain nga ability dia tue macam2 la test dia buat... Tls yg Benji nangis bile kna provoke.. dtg bulan la... More towards experimenting la... N dlm episod nie gk dia jmpa nga Datok Kamal...siap bersalam bagai.. Bile jmpa new doc instead of Dr Priya, Dr Chong tu inject ape ntah kt dia... Headache gle2 smpai Dr Chong blh ckp he would rather die than facing the pain... Ho3... bile Imzan sedar dia mmg xthn sakit tp dia smpt tls kt dinding What If the headache gone.. Immediately hilang... Pas2 dia request la nk nurse nye unifrom then nurse yg baik Rahman kot nama dia dtg bg bj nurse...hahaha... Runaway mission started!!! Oh ya... dia pn dh dpt jalan sbb dia tls walk if he can walk...he3 ending ep 5 dia kna kejar nga pak guard.

Episod 6... dia tls What if he is invisible... Tadaa... berjaya la dia larikan diri bile org xnmpk dia...so dia wondering around la..tengok gelagat manusia... since org x nmpk dia kn.bile terlanggar terkejut la xde pape kt blkg..he3 then dia  lpk kdai mamak, tgk sorang pmpuan kna buli nga boss dia n dia decide nk pmpuan tu jd hamba dia..automatically pmpuan tue nmpk dia n jd hamba dia... dia pn lpk kt umh dis girl la... at the same time dia praktis dia nye power...aku singkatkn story je la...pjg sgt nk cte semua... de sorang jiran dat girl nie stalk dia... Imzan try la tls mcm2 kt da tp x menjadi...yg laki nie Shamsi name dia psiko...i think serial rapist.. so bile dia try pmpuan ni tp kna halang nga kawan dia, si Shamsi nie smpai tahap bunuh kwn dat girl.. N bile ade peluang dia msk umh dat girl n try to rape her.. Imzan came to rescue.. Pas2 dia suh dat girl blk kg..KL x slmt for her... Masa dia lepak kt bwh, Shamsi nie terlanggar dia... Dia pn sj je la tls What If Shamsi got hit by a car.. and it happen.. So What If rule is 1. All the things should start with What If 2. Anything pasal Imzan akan menjadi 3. Imzan kna sentuh org yg dia nk story about.

Episod 7 What If U are Kanibal... dia buat kat Jamal Lokman kot nama mamat tu.. adik ipar dia.. Jahat gk mamat nie wat kt dia dulu.. Plant dadah kt umh dia then pggl polis... So si Jamal Lokman ni bile lapo darah dia beli la raw meat kt Giant... hehehe... Pas2 hisap darah pmpuan... Dia dh plan nga sorang cashier Giant tue tp dia lmbt dtg sbb tgk gaya bile dia kanibal nie jd cm werewolf gitu..berbulu bagai... So cashier tu balik je... Dia pn pggl secretary dia la..nk lps gian.. bile dia nk hisap drh secretary dia, minah tue mnjerit..org dtg..terbantut lagi.. so dia blk umh nk makan je sape2 yg ade.. dia serang Datok Kamal, tetiba Shasha muncul... Jamal kejar dia...dh nk terkam bdk nie bapak dia ugut nga pistol...last2 dia tembak kt kepala sbb x dgr ckp..mati la lg sorang ank dia... huhuhu...nape la x tembak kt paha ke...p aim kepala wat pe...ho3 n dlm nie gk dpt tau yg Imzan xleh reverse ape yg dia buat n ank dia dpt nmpk dia..sbb dia try nk reverse la Jamal  Lokman dr jd kanibal sbb ank dia dlm bhy sbb dk serumah... Ending for Jamal mcm x ptt j kn...tp ayt yg best mmg x ptt nasib Jamal mcm tue but seeing Datok Kamal hurt like that is very satisfying...lbh krg gitu la ayt dia... Totally agreed!!

Ok la.. nanti sambung lagi la.. Melampau panjang dh post yg nie...hahaha

A LiTTLe BiT of LoNeLiNesS

There comes a time in life...
Where u feel like no one could understand u..
No one seems to care...
No one seems to bother...
All left is their judging eyes..
Their dark hearts...
Their selfish will....
It tighten ur chest...
It breaks ur every bones..
It leaves a big scar in ur broken heart...
It make u feel lonely..
Alone in this big old world...
Trying ur best to get up...
With all ur might..
With no one's help..
U must be strong...
U must resist all the attentions...
All the bad intentions...
Stay firm.. Stay strong...
U are all u got..
Others will always fail u...
Don't add another name for that list...
Do not fail ur self!!!!!

UpSet..TenSe...BrOkeN...

Dah lebih seminggu aku tak membebel kat sini... Aku tersangat tak suka dengan ape yang aku rasa sekarang...Seriusly... 1 months already... Just get over him la.... Damn u!!!

So as part of my recovery process, I took 3 day untuk habiskan Fast and Furious series... Best rupanye... Hahaha... And aku pn search balik all my good Japanese dram yang pernah sentuh hati aku dulu... H2.. sekarang tgh layan Zettai Kareshi.. Habis yang ni tengok Taiyo no Uta la pulak... very heart warming story... n ade part2 sedey la of course.hehehe

Aku memang nak lepaskan dia... Aku harus lepaskan dia.. Tapi kenapa hati aku sangat berat untuk itu.. Dia dah hancurkan hati aku... Selumat-lumatnye... Tapi kenapa... Sihir ape kau bagi aku nie... Kau dh bersikap kejam dengan aku.. Tapi kenapa masih sukar aku nk lepaskan kau.. Haruskah aku bersikap kejam padamu jua?

God... help me in dis recovery...

SaLam RaMaDhaN

Dear blog..sorry dah agak lama x update... I am having mood swing for past few days... Hope it will over soon..

Sedar x sedar dah masuk bulan Ramadhan... Wahh.. my last Ramdhan alone is during my 1st year of Uni... OMG..so long time ago... Facing 1st Ramadhan alone I hope I am not touchy mouchy la.. Life goes on beb.. It is up to u whether u wanna stay there or just keep moving as time goes by... I choose to keep moving.. Cuma momentum dia lambat sikit la.. Inertia tinggi.. Maklum la pemalas..Hahaha

Aku harap Ramadhan this year akan memberi seribu satu perubahan dalam diri aku.. Aku akan cuba menjadi hamba Allah yang terbaik.. at least the best version of myself this year.. Aku lalai sangat sebelum nie.. Mengharapkan pintu keampunan masih belum tertutup buat aku..

Selamat menunaikan puasa u alls.. May this Ramadhan bring more blessing for us. Pray for the best!!!!

Don'T STaY

Hi guys..

Today i just wanna share this video je..Actually the song yang I nak share. This is how I am feeling right now. But still don"t have the gut to send this to my ex boyfriend.. Maybe not ready to let go kot. God..give me strength for that.

Don'T STaY

Sometimes I need to remember just to breathe

Sometimes I need you to stay away from me

Sometimes I'm in disbelief I didn't know

Somehow I need you to go

Don't stay

Forget our memories

Forget our possibilities

What you were changing me into

Just give me myself back and

Don't stay

Forget our memories

Forget our possibilities

Take all your faithlessness with you

Just give me myself back and

Don't stay

Sometimes I feel like I trusted you too well

Sometimes I just feel like screaming at myself

Sometimes I'm in disbelief I didn't know

Somehow I need to be alone

I don't need you any more, I don't want to be ignored

I don't need one more day of wasting me away

I don't need you any more, I don't want to be ignored

I don't need one more day of wasting me away

With no apologies

Don't stay

Don't stay

StaRry STarRy NigHt

I have download this movie a long time ago but only manage to watch it today. There are a lot of other movies pending to watch. Hopefully I manage to watch all of it. I loved to download a lot but watch very little. =P

So this is a very heart warming story. The story about a girl, Mei who has parents that always fight with each other everyday and they really put stress in her. One time she even plan to runaway to his granpa's house in the mountain. She is standing for long hours in train station but then decide to go home. Her parent did not even notice that she's gone. Sad =(

It is on Christmas night, where choirs troupe are singing around the neighbourhood and she listen to a recoder sound played by a kid across her building. That boy caught her eyes. Next morning in school that boy is her new classmate named Jay. He is a bit cold, don't even talk to anyone. Mei followed him after school and turn out he go to stationary shop and shoplifting there. Seeing how good he is, Mei tried it too and she has so much fun.

Next day in school she go to Jay's desk and take a look at his sketch book. The painting is beautiful but some of it contain naked woman so it became an issues when others find out. Mei is feeling guilty and ask for forgiveness but being ignored by Jay. After school, Mei stumble across kids beating Jay and she help him resulting to injured her own arm. At school, Jay's mum got angry and slap him due to misunderstood that Jay hit Mei. Mei then back up the story saying Jay is actually helping her from being bullied. That is the start of their friendship.

After that incident, Mei's grandpa pass away. She felt really depressed and keep doing Starry Starry Night puzzle until finished but she lost 1 last piece. The centre part of the star. Being gloomy all day, she is not herself at school and then she goes to stationary shop to shoplift but this time around Jay is the one following her. She got busted by the shop owner but Jay come to rescue saying to her that she forgot to pay the things she takes. They then go back home and Jay ask her to help in class decoration project and of course she agreed.

Since that day, they always go to school together, doing all sort of animal origami for the contest. So sweet and lovely. But there is a boy Shawn who always try to pick a fight with Jay. Mei is sensing their parents problem ask Jay to accompany her late at night at school. It is the day before the contest end. Next day, students are gathering at their class but positively they think because of their work is the best but actually the work is destroyed. I bet by Shawn. Jay got mad and rush towards Shawn and beat him badly.

One day Mei's parent decided to get divorce and Mei can decide to live with either mum or dad. Feeling depressed she decide to runaway. He go to Jay's home and they talk a lot that night. They decide to go to Grandpa's house together. So much fun travelling together in the jungle. Resting near waterfall. Then when its time to go they choose they wrong and end up in an old church building for the night. They listen to each other that night. Jay's has an abusive father after he got into accident at work. Since then they keep running away from his dad and his father always find a way to them.

Next day they go down the hill and find Mei's grandpa's house. Bring back so much memory to her. At night they go to the lake and lay down in a old rowing boat waiting for mist to clear the air and see the stars. So romantic. Oh by the way they are just 13. Then Jay talk about how happy he is this few days but he has to leave because his dad already find them. But Mei is not responding due to high fever. They are walking in the rain last night before reaching the old church.

Jay run in a rush while holding Mei on his back towards the house. That's when he saw the beautiful Starry Night. That night is their last moment together. In Mei's dream she saw Jay is leaving and the puzzle shattered. Same as their parents puzzle, shattered. Nothing can be done. Then she met her grandpa and hugged. When she wakes up, her mum is by her side. Her parent is still divorced. But she lead a happy life even without Jay. She never saw Jay ever after that summer. But one day she received a letter and inside there is her missing Starry Starry Night puzzle. The words really touch my heart. " EVERYTHING PASSES. BUT BEFORE LETTING GO HOLD ON AS TIGHT AS YOU CAN"

Years later in Paris during Christmas, Mei is with her new sister. Her mum  remarried and moved to Paris.
While they walking home they pass by a puzzle store and it caught the young girl eyes about all the puzzle is missing 1 piece. They enter the shop and all of the puzzle there is missing 1 centre piece. As Mei walking, she saw Starry Starry Night puzzle with the same missing piece as her puzzle years before. Then the owner come and say Merry Christmas and Mei's eyes flooded with tears. You can guess it right. Sweet ending. Watch it. Won't regret it. If you need the link for download u may request personally.

Here also some screenshot from the movie.

This is the decoration contest made by Jay & Mei. Nice rite?

Waiting for stars to come out.. 

Here comes the star..

Jay is running while holding Mei

Starry Starry Night Puzzle

Post Di PaGi Hari

Haish...for past 2 weeks memang bermasalah tido aku.. Maklum la.. Hidup pn bermasalah kan... Tadi kul 4 terjaga sampai sekarang aku xleh tido.. Adoii...esok pagi keje nie...

So aku nak membebel ape ye pagi nie... Aku sebenarnya sangat suka menjahit. Ever since aku kecik lagi memang suka bertukang n menjahit. But kat rumah aku xde mesin jahit. Bila masuk sekolah menengah aku dipaksa amik kemahiran manipulatif tambahan. Cikgu x kasi amik eknomi rumah tangga. Maklum la aku all girl school. Lagi ramai yg layak amik ERT dari aku nie. Alasan cikgu sebab aku x pandai guna mesin jahit. Sedey =(

Sekarang I would like to pursue my dream again. Aku nak mula menjahit balik.. Aku dah beli mesin jahit setelah sekian lama  berangan. Sekarang aku baru start the projek nga baju anak anak sedara aku. Nanti ade masa aku upload the finished product ek.. Yang puas hati bajud girls la. Yang boy sorang tue susah la.. Baju budak laki kan... hmm...xpe.. next post la gmbr2 di ek.. if ade yg interested aku blh share dia pnye cara... aku style agak2 pnye person j...hahaha

Final Cinta JanGan PerGi

Wah.. banyak betul cerita2 aku follow come to an end this week. Start with Epilog Cinta Khirana, Tanah Merah and now Cinta Jangan Pergi. In this post lets borak pasal Cinta Jangan Pergi lah.

In this story, watak yang paling aku suka is Khalil. He would do everything to fight for his love. He tried everything. And once bila dia dapat tau yang Soraya dh tunang dengan org lain dia mmg break down. Tapi he never give up. Dia try lg hantar surat with Interlarken catalog nak suh Soraya cari dia kat sana. Tapi takdir  memang x menyebelahi diorang. Masa tue dia break down and thinkingof revenge. I almost do the same but still behave. Hehehe... He is a true lover. Fighting until the end.

Hud pun ok jugak la. Tapi dia amik kesempatan atas keadaan Soraya. That is not a good action man. Tapi kesian la. He should not end up dying. Dahsyat jugak la nasib dia tue. Aku ingat ending dia akan kapel nga Shireen ke ape. But director knows best. Hehehe

Watak yang aku x suka is definitely Lea Soraya itself. Tak suka sangat la kat dia nie..Kata cinta tu sangat agung la...Sangat suci la... What so ever lagi la. But then bila Hud datang mcm senang2 je terima.. Memang la dia really a lot like Khalil but x sampai setahun pn lagi Khalil so called mati that time. Cepat sangat move on. Kalo Khalil tinggalkan dia sbb pompuan lain len cite rr tapi nie sbb mati. Cepat sangat kot move on. Tak sesuai langsung tema Cinta Agung tue.. Then bila smbg balik n dpt tahu pasal Shireen, langsung xnk dgr explaination Khalil. Not even a chance. Kat Hud blh pulak bagi. Pas2 even dah tau perkara sebenar sekalipun still xnk terima Khalil lagi. What is on ur mind girl???

Tapi still...dah dia tue heroin kn...so at last hero dapat kt dia gk rr...Dia p cari Khalil kt kg org asli...dapat kt dia jugak...hehehe...Cmne sekalipun character dia,
I still love the ending. Hehehe.. Aku memang suka kot cite2 Khabir Bhatia nie...hehehe..Till then la...Jumpa lagi...

WhiTe House Down ~~ Awesome!!!

Yeah...the post explain everything...Such an awesome film..I do not knows about others but for me this film is very entertaining and meet my expectation. Channing Tatum is such a cool and handsome dad and Jaime Fox is a funny president. Hahaha

At first, I am not  interested to watch this film. It could be just Olympus Has Fallen movie. But this is better!!
The story is about a guy John Cale, who work his ass off in his life, then he join military force while his daughter is about    3 years old if I am not mistaken. His daughter, Emily Cale is such a patriotic girl is at her 13 years old. Very2 in love with US President, James Sawyer.

John Cale is in security details for White House speaker, I forgot his name..Hehehe...Then after sending White House speaker to White House, he meet Jenna his friend for a favour in an interview for Security Service in White House and one more favour for a visitor pass for his daughter for a tour in White House.
He go to his ex wife house to pick up her sulky daughter and bribe her with the visitor pass tour. Emily has youtube channel and got so excited with that tour.

Before the tour he go for the interview and the person incharge i his ex during college. Hahaha...strike!! And of course with his track record he got rejected and when he come out and meet his daughter the girl is so excited and he just have to lie about getting the position. Then they proceed to the tour and at an area they meet US President themselves. Emily is so excited and asking question for her Youtube channel. She really hates it when his dad call it a blog but do nothing when US President say the same thing. Hahaha...

Then when the attack start, all the action begin. Emily is in the toilet during that time and got separated form the group. His dad escape from the room and try to find her but end up finding Mr President himself. Now he is in charge of President's security. They try all possible way to escape, killing all the bad guys. Just like any other action film.

The best part is up until 3/4 of the film we do not know who the real culprit is and why are they doing that. I do not want to spoil it. You should watch it yourself. The action is cool, the twist in plot is so nice and unpredictable, the character is strong and funny. What else do I need. All is already there. And at last John Cale got his position as President's security.

Watch it. You won't regret it.. Two thumbs up!!!

Kenangan Itu Mengusik Kalbu

Pagi tadi masa nak bangun tido rasa tak berdaya sangat. Biasa nya every weekend is my most energetic day to wake up. Tapi tidak untuk hari ini. Aku harap ni cuma bersifat sementara. Everyday wake up 1st thing aku check is my phone. Morning wishes. But sekarang no more. We are really drifting apart. So many thing left unsaid. But what is the point of saying if the results is painful. The best way is to keep it inside..mengadu dekat Allah..dia lebih memahami.

Aku tau dia takkan tau ape yang ade kat hati aku. Tapi dengan meluahkan nya kat sini, aku harap dpt la nk melegakan sikit hari yang luka ni. Even no one is reading, this is my afe place. Kat sini aku boleh jadi vulnerable.. Aku boleh menangis.. Aku boleh meraung... Whereas kat luar orang tengok aku a strong girl.. Biarlah begitu.. Biar mereka tengok aku ni cekal... Tapi Allah Maha mengetahui apa yang tersirat kat hati aku.

Berharap sangat all the bada things yang aku duk fikir2 untuk aku lepaskan kat dia akn lenyap. Aku berharap sangat Allah bagi kekuatan untuk aku..Dan ketenangan hati menghadapi hidup nie.. Dugaan yang sangat berat ini...

Cerita2 Lama Yang Menyenangkan Hati ~~ Lovely Along

Since I am officially single and available again, bila dah macam ni the first thing running in my mind is the reminesence of my good old days.

There is one guy, I am not able to track up until now. Whoever know him, really appreciate to contact me. So here aku nak share dengan you guys the story between me and him. It is such a lovely memory.. Miss u boy...

It started after my SPM. Tengah tunggu result exam. Sweet 18...hehehe..sweet la sangat.. Aku ni someone yang very independent. Aku anak no 4 dlm family from 6. Understandable kan.. Aku selalu je berkeras dengan ape yang aku nak. Aku anak yg pertama go out for work after SPM. Saje la bosan2.. Nak duit lebih kan.. So aku join this one company..buat direct selling kepala gas..Yup..kepala dapur gas.

Sebab this place jauh dari rumah aku and dia ade sediakan asrama so aku pun stay la kt asrama tue... 1st day is briefing day. This is when I 1st met him.. Nama dia Hafiz.. Abdul Hafiz.. Dia senyum2 kat aku... My 1st impression is gatal betul mamat nie..hahaha..then the briefing start..aku wat bodo je la kt dia kan...then when everthing is over, orang2 lain dh blah balik... tinggal aku nga dia j kat situ...cause he is also staying in da hostel..hostel tu ats bangunan je..Awkward!!!

Then masa tu we start talking.. I do not know la what happen but we just click. We are talking like we known each others for a long time... X sangka 1st impression is not my good point in this... Aku selesa giler nga dia. Sangat selesa.. Kami sebaya... Dia muda 1 bln 2 hari dari aku.. Hehehe... Since talking in a room berdua is very tidak sopan so aku pn blah turun bawah nga dia.. Lepak kt kedai makan with his cousin.

A bit about him.. dia ni orang terengganu..aku lupa la dkt mane.. either kuala terengganu or kemaman..dulu i used to have his address but kanak2 kn... aku tulis ats kertas j dan alamat tue dh xtau kt mane dah.. Masa b4 SPM dia accident motor.. 2 bulan x g skolah...SPM jawab cincai je la... and he is a motor freak.. I senang cakap mat rempit la kot..hahaha

Malam tu kami juz kuar ramai2 la... berjalan area situ...aku kuar nga other girls dia kuar nga group lain...saje la jauhkan diri sikit kn... then dia datang kt  aku tanya nape aku x join dia...Aku pn poyo la cakap mcm hepi j dia in dat group.. So xnak la aku kacau.. Tapi jwpn dia is so sweet.. Memang la hepi kt sana but he wanted to be with me...Auww...I call dis love at 2nd sight..hahaha.. Dat night he give me his picture and so did I. That night, got ourself a nick name..he is along and I am achik...sweet!!!

The next day, we are inseparable. Mane2 je memang berkepit.. berdua je... Sampai others fikir we are a couple.. yang dh lama know each other.. Pdhal 1 hari je kot.. He really touch my heart. We even have ourself our own songs, Jangan Pisahkan and Janji Kita. Setiap kali dengar lagu2 ni...aku mesti teringat kt dia..even now pn...

Malam2 kami akn lepak atas bangunan. Very pecefull and romantik. Dia promise after raya cina dia akn balik rumah bawak gitar dia and kami hang out kt sana lagi.. listening to him playing guitar for me..3rd night kami lepak sama2 ats bangunan tu tiba2 ade pulak bunga api...my sweetest memory ever..

Hari ke 4 dia nk balik kampung dah.. Dia hantar aku balik rumah dgn motor dia... Hantar dkt bus stop je sebenarnya.. Sebab dis is my 1st time riding  a bike dengan lelaki.. Aku budak baik tau dulu... Tiket bas dia after jumaat. Really nak hantar dia but condition x mengizinkan.. That is one of my regret. After dat dia x datang tempat keje tue. His mum suruh dia keje kat terengganu je.. That is da last time I met him.

Cousin dia datang jmpa aku and amik the remaining of his stuff.. I keep his lighter and one of his shirt.. As a memory.. Still have the lighter but the shirt.. mak aku x reti sentimental value..ho3 gone already...After that aku pun quit the job and pegi Pengkalan Hulu teman sepupu aku.. Laki dia askar, so i help them moving in new place.. Tmpt tu sangat la hulu... Nk jmpa public phone pn susah.. My 1st night there, I dream of him. Rupa2nya bila aku balik rumah my mum kata ade a guy call nk cakap nga aku.. It was him..at the night that i dream of him... Aku betul2 regret the decission of going there. If I could go back, I would like to change that day.  Not only because of him, but my future too. Suppose aku blh pegi stadi oversea and tak mungkin jumpa my ex kt UiTM yang break my heart this hard.

Hmmm... I continue the story about Along in other post la... Too long already I think...Along... where ever you are I miss you..Really want to meet u again.. Never stop praying for that to happen. U know my house right. And I still keep my old number..for u to reach me.. Also still staying at the same house.

RoAd tO ReCoVerY

I have a melt down last night.. Too many bad influences came.. Too  many information clouding my judgement.. But as bad as I am, I still can control it.. I still can have kindness inside me.. Not to destroy u.. who practically already destroy my life.

Up this point, I am so proud of myself. I never thought that I would do this kind of good things for someone who almost ruin my life.. Ruin my future... And everything I have left.. I manage to control the desire to revenge... The hatred... I eat all the pain... I shallowed it down stomach.. Alone.. Without You.. I am proud of it...

I know the conclusion that we have is not as you wanted.. You really want me out of your life... Give me time babe.. 7 years is not easy to forget... All the things is still fresh is my mind.. I pray everyday for God to forgive all the mistakes we've done together... Ask for strength to go through this alone... Asking for a peace in my mind.. But I do not know how can i ever forgive you for that... Never gonna happen.

I hope this road to recovery will go on smoothly... Less bumpy roads... But what is a life without bumpy roads right... Pray for me...

KIL -- Review dari Mata Aku

Yo...dis time aku nk review cite KIL la pulak..memang la dh lapuk pn cte tue..maklum la...aku tak tengok cite melayu kt panggung...aku download je...hehehe...

Cite dia bagi aku agak slow la..n agak preditable tapi ade twist skek..start nga Akil yg halang budak skolah dr nk bunuh diri... but one he end up try to do da same... tapi bkn sbb break up la.. sbb lonely... at da end agk2 tau la nape... rupanya ma dia meninggal sbb accident..dia yg bwk kete...

Masa nk try bunuh diri leh lak dia terjumpa poster syarikat yg jalankan msi bunuh diri...Lps try call dia p la sana da next day... Jmpa nga consultant...cte la how things work bagai...he never know who will kill him... and no turning back..bile blk umh mula la prejudis nga sumer org...tgk org tue rasa mcm org nk bunuh dia... siap mimpi2 bagai...

That is all until he meet Zara.. semua menda berubah la.. he start to live again...and afraid of dying...bila one time ade org culik dia n try to kill him kononnye... trs la dia nekd nk fight for his life...bile terlepas blk umh tgk umh bersepah...terjumpa la gmbr dia...then dia serang Zara la...cause she actually work kt cmpany tue..

Then when the time came, consultant dia pn dtg la nk bunuh dia... cuak siot...rupa2nye...ni bukan agensi utk bunuh diri..tp utk tlg org yg berkenginan nk bunuh diri.. so bile dh terasa takut nk kna bunuh keinginan utk hidup tue dtg blk...cm2 la lbh kurangnye...

Pendeknye cite...ade lg la scene2 yg aku x story..bg rangka cite dh la kot...tengok sndr rr nanti..tengok online boleh..dolod pn blh..tp  hati2...ade yg memerhati..hehehe..Oh ya...aku suka tengok Cristina Sussane berlakon..dia sgt ayu..n Redza Minhat depressed man..mmg nmpk depressed..hehehe..tapi kalo tgk kt panggung aku x rasa puas ati dgn jln cte dia tp sbb aku dolod j aku bg la 3 bntang...hehehe

Facing da Reality after 11 dys

Finally... I have the courage to tell the world that I am no longer his girlfriend.. That we are already break up... Hopefully aku akan terus kuat dan cekal menghadapi hari2 mendatang tanpa dia... Memang x semudah itu nak lupakan segalanya.... Nk masuk 8 tahun aku berkepit j nga dia... all da time we spent together... all joy and pain...

But I believe God have a better plan for me.. Maybe he is not man enough for me.. or i am never good enough for him... All is in God's hand... Have faith.. Everything will be over soon. Mendung pasti akan berarak pergi... Matahari akan terus bersinar... Just do ur best... Be strong.. Never give up... Never lose the determination...

Yakin Boleh!!!!

Untuk Kamu Syang... Selamat Tinggal

Hari ini...Pagi ini...Hatiku terusik lagi....
Bayangan wajahmu tidak pernah padam dari ingatan
Senyum mu yang dulu menyinari hariku
Kini bagai awan mendung yang meliputi ruang langit ku...
Bagai jerebu yang mengahalang pandanganku...
Bagai asid yang mengahakis kulitku...
Bagai racun yang menyesakkan rongga pernafasanku..
Pergilah...Pergilah jauh dari diri ini...
Tak tertahan lagi aku menanggung duka ini...
Hati ini sudah cukup parah...
Pergilah...Mungkin ini yang terbaik untuk kita...
Mungkin in sudah tersurat untuk kita...
Aku tak berdaya melawan takdir...
Aku tak mampu lagi mempertahankan rasa ini..
Dan aku pasti kau juga tidak lagi mahu berada di sini...

Selamat Tinggal Sayang...Moga kau bahagia dengan pilihan Ibumu...
Andai kau masih menyayangiku...anggaplah aku mimpi indah mu...
Andai semua itu tiada lagi...anggaplah aku sebagai angin yang menerpa pipimu..
Semudah itu boleh dilupakan..
Boleh di abaikan....

Favorite Drama : Part 1 (What If..)

Haaa...hari ni aku nak bercerita pasal drama2 baru kt tv yg aku tgh follow...mmg best...hopefully makin ramai la supporter utk genre drama mcm nie...thriller seram...

Citer ni tajuk dia What If...to my surprise the director of this tv series is Jehan Miskin. Ad dis is 1st serie g dia direct..mantap rr cte nie...storyline dia mmg best..cinematography pn ok bg aku...

What if is a story about Imzan lakonan Josiah Hogan yg mengalami gangguan emosi at his 40 dia masuk hospital jiwa name Loonie Bin. Kat dlm wad gile tue org mmg lyn dia cm hampeh n keje dia menulis je... A very twisted story and the story became reality. Dia guna la ability dia tu utk balas dendam kat org2 yg pnh buat jahat kt dia...pelakon2 in each episod lain2...

For example episod 1 What if A Mother is a Serial Killer pelakon dia Azizah Mahzan, Nas T, Julie Woon...tu yg utama la...sorang makcik yg keje kt Loonie Bin tue depress sbb laki baru mati turn out to be a serial killer. Semua is as story written by Imzan.

So far dh 3 episod on air. Ep 2 What if kite blh dgr ape yg ade dlm fikiran orang...Ep 3 sal what if kite blh nmpak hantu...yg ni episod plg best so far...hehehe...

Really encourage sape2 yg suka thriller seram pnye genre to watch this show...x sabar nk tggu mggu dpn...oh ya cte ni on air every Wednesday 10pm at 8tv. Enjoy watching

Nk bg trailer tp x jmpa lak video nk embeded kt sni...cari sndr rr kt youtube ek...he3

Derita di Hati Tak Siapa Yang Tahu

All this videos is summarizing what i am feeling right now..=(

Rindu Sehiris Rindu by Screen

Kau Dipaksa Aku Terpaksa

Itu dulu la utk post yang nie...later kalo rajin aku post lain lak

Man of Steel dari Perspective Mata Aku

Hi there... tonight wanna talk about Man of Steel...hmm...a lot is going on with me right now...let just talk about some happiness instead of gloomy things.

Just now having a midnight with old friend...Man of Steel..Bukan midnite movie kot kalo tayangan dia kul 10.50pm kn...hehehe....

Storyline is very mendatar...kinda boring la jugak...very slow...start cte what happen in Planet Krypton...Why Kal-el is sent to earth..boleh tau history superman la....itu pn dh makan setengah jam...Then come a part bile Kal-el is now Clark Kent...Keje dia asyik dk flash back j...cmne dia pnh kantoi ade super power...how badly his father want him to keep it a secret smpai sggp mati in order to keep the secret...very powerful meaning...and sad of course

Bila Lois Lane muncul, there comes the action part...aku rasa panjang gile dia punye action smpai tahap aku pk bile la action dia nk habis...bangunan tumbang sana sini...tembus merata2...i don't find it interesting...just wish end it already...ho3

Tapi ni opinion aku la...maybe ade org yg ske action mcm tue...aku x kot...hehehe...kalo rating aku bg 3 out of 5  kot..sbb even storyline dia mendatar, i kinda like the story...love..moral value...faith...and trust...

Do comment if u think otherwise..nak jugak dgr kepala otak orang macam mane...hehehe

It's a Long Long Journey.....

I am back...bila dah xde tempat mengadu...blog nie la jadi mangsa...starting from today, I am gonna update u at least seminggu sekali...nk let it all out here...since no one knows me right...so judge me how ever u want... I don't mind....

Sekarang hati sangat pedih.... jiwa sangat2 terseksa.. tapi x dpt nk luah nga kata2..hanya mampu termenung jauh melayan duka...berat sangat dugaan nie Tuhan... Lepas satu satu masalah datang...dh xde dahan nk berpaut...kalo ade pn dah reput...tunggu masa dh jatuh je...bila akar dh x kuat...angin sikit pn pokok dh boleh tumbang...x kira lagi anai2 la...kulat2 la...pokok2 parasit lagi...in the end u just have to give up...and move on...

Move on... Move on... Move on.... itu lah menda yang paling berat nak buat sekarang.. really hopping dat one day I will be able to do that... and hope it is not too late....

My apologies for the broken + rojak english... sometimes the right words lies between the two language...
Hehehe....